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As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
Xi Chongxi wrote to Xie Gong, saying: "Wang Jingren heard that a young man aspires to ascend the throne. I wonder if Duke Huan's virtue has declined, and if he is afraid of the younger generation's restoration?"
When Du Yu arrived in Jingzhou, he stopped at Qili Bridge and all the court officials came to pay their respects to him. When he was young, he was humble, fond of heroism, and was not satisfied with material things. Since Yang Ji was a famous figure, he was so brave and handsome that he left without sitting down. After a while, He Changyu came and asked, "Where is Yang Youwei?" The guest answered, "He left without sitting down just now." Changyu said, "He must be riding his horse under the Daya Gate." When they went to the Daya Gate, they indeed saw a large cavalry parade. The long carriage embraced the inner carriage and they were carried back together, and they sat as before.
"No! In the beginning of Lu, the royal family looked at the Fengbei, and the three families looked at the Huanying. In the same way, if someone's mother was skilled, then can't you do it? Is his mother skilled? Is she sick? Alas!" He didn't follow it.
Someone asked, "Why do people bury their parents after three days of death?" The answer is: filial sons are sad and resentful when their parents die, so they crawl on the ground and cry, as if they will be resurrected, how can they be taken away and buried. Therefore, it is said that the funeral is held after three days, in order to wait for the body to be reborn. If the body is not reborn after three days, it is also dead. The filial son's heart will also be weakened; the family plan and clothing can also be completed; the distant relatives can also come. Therefore, the sages made a decision to set a three-day ritual system.
Gu Changkang worshipped Huan Xuanwu's tomb and composed a poem: "The mountains collapsed and the seas dried up, where will the fish and birds go?" Someone asked him: "You relied on Huan so much, can you see your crying?" Gu said: "My nose is like a wide wind, and my eyes are like a river bursting." Someone else said: "My voice is like thunder that breaks the mountain, and my tears are like a river pouring into the sea."
The three-year mourning is finished, and the mourning of the period is finished. After the funeral, the old hemp belt is worn, and the mourning of the period is worn. The mourning of the great mourning is also the same. For the small mourning, there is no change.
Li Xin was the fifth son of Mao Zeng. He was pure and chaste and had high ideals, but he was weak and sickly when he was young and refused to marry or take up a career in government. He lived in Linhai, near the tomb of his brother, the Shizhong. Since he had a high reputation, Prime Minister Wang wanted to invite him to a position of honor, so he appointed him as an official in the government. When Xin received the letter, he said with a smile, "Maohong has lent me another cup of wine!"
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