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When a person dies, he should not be idle for three days, and he should not be relieved for three months. He should be sad for three years, and he should be worried for three years - this is the killing of grace. The sage uses killing to control moderation, and this is why mourning lasts for three years. The wise should not go beyond the limit, and the unworthy should not fail to reach the limit. This is the mean of mourning, and it is what the king always does. The Book of Documents says: "Emperor Gaozong was lenient and did not speak for three years." This is good; all kings should follow this ritual. Why is it good for him alone? It is said: Emperor Gaozong was Wu Ding; Wu Ding was a wise king of the Yin Dynasty. He succeeded the throne and was kind and good at mourning. At this time, the Yin Dynasty declined and revived, and rituals were abolished and revived, so he did it well. Because it was good, it was recorded in the book and praised, so he was called Emperor Gaozong. During the three-year mourning, the king did not speak. The Book of Documents says: "Emperor Gaozong was lenient and did not speak for three years." This is what it means. However, those who say "speaking without culture" refer to the ministers.
Emperor Ming asked Zhou Boren: "What is his true height like?" He replied: "I am a thousand-jin tall." The prince laughed at his words. Bo Ren said: "It is better to use a curled-horn ox, which is worse than a coiled ox."
Zeng Zi asked, "When a envoy dies in his residence, etiquette says: public residences are restored, but private residences are not restored. In all countries where envoys are granted residences by officials, public residences are already public residences, so why do you say that private residences are not restored?" Confucius said, "What a good question! The homes of ministers, officials, and scholars are called private residences; public residences and official residences are called public residences. The restoration of public residences is what it means." Zeng Zi asked, "The lower dead: Tu Zhou buried in the garden, and then went there by carriage, because the road was close. Now the tomb is far away, how should it be buried?" Confucius said, "I heard Lao Dan say: In the past, Shi Yi had a son who died, which was the lower dead. The tomb was far away, and Zhao Gong asked him, 'Why don't you bury him in the palace? ' Shi Yi said, 'How dare I? ’ Duke Zhao told Duke Zhou about this, and Duke Zhou said, ‘Is it not possible?’ Shi Yi did it. The use of coffins and coffins for the deceased was first introduced by Shi Yi.
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
When I went to see the new bride at Xie's house, she still had Hui's style, with a dignified demeanor and neat clothes. The king sighed and said, "I am sending my daughter to cut your ears!"
Yu Zhigong wrote to Huan Wen, saying, "Liu Daosheng is always busy with things, big or small, and is very happy. He is a man of integrity and good humor, and is a good friend. He is truly a good person, and I recommend him to you, so that we can share the hardship together."
Chen Zhuangzi died and went to Lu. The people of Lu did not want to cry. Duke Mu summoned Xianzi and asked him about it. Xianzi said, "In ancient times, the officials did not finish their work. Even if they wanted to cry, how could they cry? Today's officials are involved in the government of China. Even if they want not to cry, how can they not cry? Moreover, I have heard that there are two ways to cry: one is to cry for love, and the other is to cry for fear." The Duke said, "Yes, then what should we do?" Xianzi said, "Please cry in the temples of different surnames." So he cried with the Xianshi. Zhongxian said to Zengzi: "The Xia Dynasty used Mingqi to show that the people were ignorant; the Yin people used sacrificial utensils to show that the people were knowledgeable; the Zhou people used both to show that the people were suspicious." Zengzi said: "Is it not so! Is it not so! Mingqi is a ghost instrument; sacrificial utensils are human instruments; why did the ancient people die for their own parents?" Gongshu Mu's half-brother died, and he asked Ziyou. Ziyou said: "Is it a great merit?" Di Yi's half-brother died, and he asked Zixia. Zixia said: "I have never heard of it before; the people of Lu wear Qisui for him." Di Yi wore Qisui. The Qisui of today is what Di Yi asked.
Sun Xinggong said: "Pan's writing is like a piece of brocade, and everything is good; Lu's writing is like separating gold from sand, and treasures are often found."
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