Fun Sports

Love and hope for a long marriage

Li Yuanli once sighed about Xun Shu and Zhong Hao, saying: "Mr. Xun's wisdom is hard to emulate, while Mr. Zhong's virtue is worthy of being a model."

High-profile pampering: Gu Shao's daily pursuit of his wife

Zi said: "A gentleman refuses the noble but not the humble, refuses the rich but not the poor, then chaos will be eliminated." Therefore, a gentleman would rather let people float above food than let food float above others. Confucius said: "If you give way to wine, beans and meat and accept the bad, the people will offend the teeth; if you give way to the seat on the lapel and sit down, the people will offend the noble; if you give way to the position in the court and accept the humble, the people will offend the monarch. "The Book of Songs says: "The people are unscrupulous, resenting one another; accepting titles without yielding them, they have finally died." Confucius said: "A gentleman values ​​others and despises himself, and puts others before himself, so the people will yield to him." Therefore, call someone else's ruler "Jun", and call yourself "Guojun". Confucius said: "In the interests of salary, those who die first and those who live later, then the people will not be disloyal; those who die first and those who survive later, then the people can be trusted." The Book of Songs says: "The thoughts of the former rulers were kept by the gullible." With this, the people still disloyalty died and cried without complaint.

Concubine

Zeng Zi asked: "Do you mourn for three years?" Confucius said: "In the three-year mourning, you should be dressed, not stand in a group, and do not travel. Gentlemen use etiquette to embellish their feelings. If you mourn for three years, isn't it empty?" Zeng Zi asked: "The officials and scholars can get rid of their private mourning, but they have the monarch's mourning clothes. How can they get rid of it?" Confucius said: "If you have the monarch's mourning clothes on your body, you dare not wear them privately. How can you get rid of them? So it is not removed after the time has passed. In the case of the king's mourning, mourning is removed before offering sacrifices, which is a ritual. Zengzi asked, "Is it okay not to remove mourning for parents?" Confucius said, "The ancient kings established rituals, and did not perform them after the time has passed, which is a ritual; it is not that they cannot do it, but they are worried that it is too much. Therefore, a gentleman does not offer sacrifices after the time has passed, which is a ritual. Zengzi asked, "When the king dies, after the funeral, if the minister has parents in mourning, what should I do?" Confucius said, "Return home and live at home. If there are important things, go to the king's place and see him off morning and evening." He said, "After the king has been buried, if the minister has parents in mourning, what should I do?" Confucius said, "Go home and cry and come back to see the king off." He said, "If the king has not buried his parents, and the minister has parents in mourning, what should I do?" Confucius said, "Go home and cry and come back to see the king off. If there are important things, go back and see him off morning and evening. For officials, the old man in the house will perform the ritual; for scholars, the descendants will perform the ritual. The wife of a great official, if there is a serious matter, should also go to the king's place, morning and night. "

Breaking through the siege

For all positions, except for the funeral of a relative, the age of mourning below all ascend the throne and cry and mourn until he has finished his work, but he removes his mourning clothes to the east, ascends the throne, exposes his hair to the east, dances, and wears mourning clothes, bows to the guests and returns to his seat, cries and dances, sends the guests back to his seat, and the attendant tells him to take his place. After three days and five cries, the host goes out to see the guests off; all the host's brothers go out, and the crying stops. The attendant tells him that the work is done. He wears mourning clothes and bows to the guests. If the host's family is far away, he wears mourning clothes and goes. For the age of mourning clothes, cry while looking at the hometown; for the great merit, cry while looking at the door; for the small merit, cry when reaching the door; for the mourning clothes, cry while ascending the throne. Cry for the father's party in the temple; for the mother's wife's party in the bedroom; for the teacher outside the temple gate; for the friend outside the bedroom gate; for the acquaintance in the wild, set up the curtain. In all cases of mourning, no offerings are made. Nine times for the emperor, seven times for the princes, five times for the ministers, and three times for the scholars. The ministers mourn for the princes, but dare not bow to the guests. The ministers in other countries cry for their positions, but dare not bow to the guests. Brothers with the princes also cry for their positions. All those who hold positions have their bare backs. Those who know each other mourn first at home and then at the tomb, and all of them dance for the funeral, facing north from the host and dancing. In all cases of mourning, the father is the main mourner when the father is still alive; after the father dies, the brothers live together and each of them mourns for his own. If the relatives are the same, the elder one is the main mourner; if they are not the same relatives, the closest one is the main mourner. When hearing about the funeral of a distant brother, the mourning period is over, and the mourning period is not heard, and the bare backs are not worn, and the left hand is preferred to bow to the guests. The only people who hold positions without mourning are sisters-in-law and uncles; and women who come down without mourning wear hemp. In all cases of mourning, if a minister arrives, he should bare his backs, bow to him, dance to him, and then kiss him; for scholars, kiss him and then bow to him.

My father-in-law is very powerful

Obsession and regret

When Xi Jiabin died, his attendants told Xi Gong that "his husband has passed away." Upon hearing this, Xi Gong was not sad, but said to his attendants, "We can tell you during the funeral." When Xi Gong went to the funeral, he was so sad that he almost died.