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The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
The two Dun of the You Yu Dynasty, the four Lian of the Xia Dynasty, the six Hu of the Yin Dynasty, the eight Gui of the Zhou Dynasty. The You Yu Dynasty used the 梡, the Xia Dynasty used the 嶡, the Yin used the 椇, and the Zhou used the 房 zu. The Xia Dynasty used the 楬 豆, the Yin used the 玉 豆, and the Zhou used the 献 豆. The You Yu Dynasty used the 韨, the Xia Dynasty used the 山, the Yin used the 火, and the Zhou used the 龙章. The You Yu Dynasty sacrificed the head, the Xia Dynasty sacrificed the heart, the Yin sacrificed the liver, and the Zhou sacrificed the lung. The Xia Dynasty valued the bright water, the Yin valued the 冴, and the Zhou valued the wine. Youyu clan had 50 officials, Xiahou clan had 100 officials, Yin had 200 officials, Zhou Zhou had 300 officials. Youyu clan had Sui, Xiahou clan had Silk, Yin had Chongya, Zhou had Bi and Shu.
When the king's carriage is about to start, the servant will hold the stalk and stand in front of the horse. After the carriage is started, the servant will unfold the reins and serve as the driver, and take the two reins from the upper right, kneel down, hold the stalk and separate the reins, drive it five steps and stand. When the king goes out to the carriage, the servant will hold the reins and hand over the reins. The left and right will make way, and the carriage will drive and the horses will be driven. When it comes to the main gate, the king strokes the servant's hand and looks back, and orders the charioteer to the right; the gates and ditches must be walked.
Zeng Zi asked: "When the crowned son arrives, he bows and yields to others and enters. Hearing about the mourning of a great meritorious service, what should be done?" Confucius said: "In the internal mourning, it is abandoned; in the external mourning, the crown is not drunk, the food is cleaned and swept, and the throne is wept. If the crown has not arrived, then it will be abandoned. If the crown is about to be worn but the date has not come, and there is a mourning of Qisui, Dagong, or Xiaogong, then the crown should be worn according to the mourning clothes. "Does the crown not change after the mourning?" Confucius said: "The emperor gives the princes and ministers the crown and hat clothes to the Grand Temple. When they return to set up a sacrifice, they wear the clothes given. There is a crown ceremony, but no crown wine. When the father dies and the crown is worn, the crown is worn and the ground is swept before offering sacrifices to the gods; after offering sacrifices, the uncles and uncles are seen, and then the crown is offered. "
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
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