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People at that time said of Ruan Sikuang: "He is not as strong as Youjun in spirit, not as elegant as Zhenchang, not as graceful as Zhongzu, not as thoughtful as Yuanyuan, but he has the beauty of all of them."
Taoist Lin went to see Mr. Xie. He was a child in Dongyang. He had just recovered from an illness and was not yet able to bear the hard work. After discussing with Mr. Lin, they ended up quarreling with each other. His mother, Lady Wang, listened to it from behind the wall, and then sent another letter ordering him to return, but the Grand Tutor kept him. Mrs. Wang then went out and said, "My new wife suffered a family tragedy when she was young. This child is all I have for my life." She burst into tears and took the child home. Mr. Xie said to his companions, "My sister-in-law's speech was so passionate and impressive that it is worthy of being passed down. I regret that I did not allow the officials to see it."
The ancient scholars: compare the ugly things. The drum does not match the five sounds, and the five sounds cannot be in harmony. The water does not match the five colors, and the five colors cannot be out of order. Learning does not match the five senses. The five senses cannot be unmanaged. The teacher does not match the five clothes, and the five clothes cannot be unrelated.
As a son, you should not live in the main hall, sit in the middle of the seat, walk in the middle of the road, or stand in the middle of the door. Food is not for the sake of abundance, and sacrifice is not for the sake of corpses. Listen to the silent and see the invisible. Do not climb high, do not stand near deep places. Don't criticize carelessly, don't smile carelessly.
When the stable burned, Confucius bowed to the villagers who came to the fire. He bowed once, and the officials twice. It is also the way to express condolences. Confucius said: "Guan Zhong encountered thieves and took two people with him. The king made them public officials and said: "The people he played with are good people!" After Guan Zhong died, Duke Huan made him mourn for him. The practice of officials mourning for officials started from Guan Zhong, and it was ordered by the king."
Xie Kun was the prefect of Yuzhang, and he was sent down to Shitou from the general's rank. Dun said to Kun, "I can no longer do anything virtuous." Kun said, "Why? From now on, I will just die and leave!" Dun again claimed illness and did not attend court. Kun told Dun, "Recently, although your actions are intended to preserve the country, your true intentions are not understood within the four seas. If you can attend court with the emperor, the ministers will be relieved and all things will be convinced. Rely on the people's support and follow their will, and retreat to serve the emperor. In this way, your achievements will be comparable to those of Yi Kuang, and your name will be passed down for thousands of years." People at that time regarded it as a famous saying.
When a senior official came to pay his respects, he would say no. When paying respects to someone, he should not be happy on that day. Women should not go beyond the border to pay respects to someone. On the day of paying respects, they should not drink alcohol or eat meat. When paying respects to a funeral, the person must hold the lead. If they follow the coffin to the grave, they should all hold the rope. When a public official pays respects, there must be someone to bow, even if they are friends or people from the state or village. When paying respects, he should say, "My lord will serve you." The host should say, "Come." When the lord sees the coffin on the road, he must send someone to pay his respects. When a senior official is buried, commoners should not receive his respects. If the brother of the wife's father dies, the son should be the main one, and he should not cry or jump. The husband should enter the room on the right, and have someone stand outside the door to inform the visitors. If they are close to him, he should go in and cry. If the father is alive, he should cry in the wife's room; if they are not the father's descendants, he should cry in other rooms. If there is a funeral, if you hear of the death of a distant brother, you should cry in the side room; if there is no side room, you should cry on the right side of the door; if they are from the same country, you should go to cry.
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