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Grand Tutor Xie asked the chief clerk Lu Tui, "Why did Zhang Ping write a eulogy for his mother but not for his father?" Tui replied, "It is because a man's virtue is shown in his deeds, and a woman's beauty cannot be revealed without a eulogy."
Aigong ordered to sit down. Confucius said: "Confucian scholars have the best treasures on the table to wait for the invitation, study hard day and night to wait for the question, be loyal and faithful to wait for the promotion, and work hard to wait for the selection. They are like this in their self-reliance.
When attending the funeral of a father, the hair is tied up in front of the hall, the clothes are exposed, the body is lowered and the clothes are covered with a white cloth. When attending the funeral of a mother, the hair is not tied up, the clothes are exposed in front of the hall, the clothes are lowered and the clothes are covered with a white cloth. After the clothes are covered and the clothes are covered, the crying stops. Cry five times and expose the clothes three times in three days. If the wife is not the descendant of the uncle, the aunt will do a small sacrifice for her.
Wang Da and Wang Gong once sat together with He Pushe. Gong was the prefect of Danyang at that time, and Dashi was the governor of Jingzhou. When the conversation was about to end, he urged everyone to drink a lot. Gong refused to drink, so Da forced him to drink. It became more and more painful, so they each tied their hands with their skirts. There were nearly a thousand people in Gong's mansion, and they were all called into the room. Although there were few left and right guards, they were also ordered to move forward, intending to kill each other. There was no plan for shooting, so they stood up and sat down in a row between two people, and then they were able to disperse. The ancients were ashamed of the so-called snobbish friendship.
Zhuge Hong had a good reputation when he was young in the Western Dynasty. He was highly regarded by Wang Yifu and was also compared to Wang by people at the time. Later, he was slandered by his stepmother's clan and accused of being a traitor. When he was about to move far away, his friend Wang Yi-fu and his companions came to the prison cart to say goodbye to him. Hong asked, "Why did the court banish me?" The king said, "They said you were a madman and a rebel." Hong said, "If you are a rebel, you should be killed. Why should a madman be banished?"
When the emperor died, the first mourning ceremony was held for three days, the officials mourned for five days, the men and women in the country mourned for seven days, and the whole country mourned for three months. The people of Yu brought a hundred woods for sacrifices, and those who could make coffins were cut down; those who did not bring them were abolished and killed.
Morality, benevolence and righteousness cannot be achieved without propriety, and teaching and correcting customs cannot be achieved without propriety. When resolving disputes, do not make the decision without proper etiquette. The relationship between the ruler and his subjects, father and son, and brothers cannot be determined without propriety. When an official studies or serves a teacher, he should not be close to him without proper etiquette. When Ban Chao governs the army and takes office to enforce the law, he must act with propriety and dignity. Praying to temples and offering sacrifices to ghosts and gods are not polite, sincere or solemn. Therefore, a gentleman is respectful, frugal, and yielding in order to show courtesy. Parrots can speak, but they are still birds; orangutans can speak, but they are still animals. People nowadays are rude, even if they can speak, don’t they have the heart of beasts? Only animals are so undisciplined that fathers and sons live together. Therefore, the sages created rituals to teach people. Teach people to be polite and know how to distinguish themselves from animals.
King Sima Jing went on an expedition to the east and captured Li Xi of Shangdang and made him a Zhonglang Attendant. He then asked Xi, "My father invited you to come, but you refused. Now I am calling you. Why did you come?" Xi replied, "My father treated me with courtesy, so I was able to advance and retreat with courtesy. You are a man of law, and I came here out of fear of the law!"
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