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Wang Da was an official in the Ministry of Personnel. He once made a draft of an essay. When he was about to submit it to the emperor, Wang Sengmi came and he showed it to him. Seng Mide then changed nearly half of the selections according to his own ideas. Wang Da thought they were very good and rewrote them immediately to present to the king.
When Confucius passed by the side of Mount Tai, a woman was crying at a grave. Confucius stood up and listened to her. He asked Zilu to ask her, "Your crying seems to be deeply worried." She said, "Yes, my uncle died of a tiger in the past, my husband also died there, and now my son has died there too." The Master asked, "Why don't you leave?" She said, "No harsh government." The Master said, "My boy, you know it. Harsh government is more fierce than a tiger."
Luo Junzhang was once at someone's house, and the host asked him to talk with the guests. He replied, "We have known each other for a long time, so I don't need to bother you again."
Duke Huan had a chief clerk who was good at distinguishing wine and would always order the clerk to taste it first when wine was available. Those who like him call him "Qingzhou Official" and those who dislike him call him "Pingyuan Inspector". There is Qi County in Qingzhou and Ge County in Pingyuan. "Chengshi" means "to the navel", and "Duyou" means "residing on the cauldron".
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
Yu Fachang visited General Yu and found a very fine whisk. The Duke said, "This is very fine, where is it from?" Fachang said, "An honest man does not ask for it, and a greedy man does not give it, so it is in my ear."
Duke Wen liked to speak slowly, while Duke Bian was a man of courtesy and rules. When they reached Yu Gongxu, they had a big fight. Wen started to speak vulgarly, and Yu Gong said slowly: "Taizhen never speaks vulgarly all day long."
When Lady Xie was teaching her son, she asked the tutor, "How come I didn't see you teaching my son for the first time?" The tutor replied, "I always teach my son myself."
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