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The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
When Gao Zigao was mourning his parents, he cried blood for three years and never showed his teeth. Gentlemen thought it was difficult.
Those who follow others in mourning should not mourn until their parents are gone. Those who follow others should mourn even when their parents are dead. If a concubine leaves a female ruler, she should not mourn for the female ruler's son. According to etiquette, there is no sacrifice without the king. The crown prince does not lower his wife's parents; his wife is the same as the son of a senior official. If the father is a scholar and the son is the emperor or a prince, then sacrifices are made to the emperor or a prince, and his body is dressed in scholar's clothes. If the father is the emperor or a prince and the son is a scholar, sacrifices are made to the scholar, and his body is dressed in scholar's clothes. If a woman leaves the house when she is in mourning, she should be removed. If she leaves the house before mourning for her parents, she should be mourned for three years. If she leaves the house after mourning, it is over. If she returns without mourning, she should be mourned for a period of time; if she returns after mourning, she should be mourned for a period of time.
When Xie Renzu was eight years old, Xie Yuzhang was about to see off a guest. At that time, he had already attained enlightenment from his words and entered the upper stream. Everyone sighed and said, "He is the younger Yan Hui sitting here." King Renzu said, "Without Ni Fu sitting here, how can we distinguish Yan Hui?"
Liu Yin and Huan Xuanwu listened to the lecture on the Book of Rites together. Huan said: "Sometimes I feel that I am close to the mysterious door." Liu said: "This is not the ultimate, it is the words of the Jinhua Palace."
When a lord is alive, he does not wear jade. He should tie the jade with his left hand and set it with his right hand. When he is at home, he should set it. When he is in the morning, he should tie the jade with his right hand and wear the jade with his right hand. He must wear jade with his belt, except when he is at a funeral. Wearing jade has teeth; a gentleman does not take off jade without reason, and a gentleman compares virtue to jade. The emperor wears white jade and a black ribbon, dukes wear mountain black jade and a red ribbon, officials wear water blue jade and a pure ribbon, the crown prince wears Yu jade and a red ribbon, and scholars wear 瓀玟 and a 缊 ribbon. Confucius wears an elephant ring five inches long and a red ribbon.
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