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When Bo Yu's mother died, he cried even after a certain period of time. The Master heard about it and said: "Who is crying with you?" The disciple said: "It's the carp." The Master said: "Hey! It's too much." Bo Yu heard about it and then got rid of it.
When serving a gentleman, the gentleman yawned and stretched himself, picked up his walking stick and shoes, and saw that the sun was setting. The attendant then asked to leave. When sitting in the presence of a gentleman, if the gentleman asks about the affairs of the day, the gentleman should stand up and answer. When one is sitting in the presence of a gentleman, if someone comes and says, "A moment," hoping to hear back, one should stand aside and wait. Do not listen sideways, do not respond loudly, do not look lustfully, and do not be lazy. When walking, do not be arrogant; when standing, do not limp; when sitting, do not spread your legs; when sleeping, do not lie prone. Keep your hair down and don't take off your hat. Don't expose your clothes when you are tired. Don't lift your skirt in the heat.
A gentleman knows the reasons why teaching is flourishing and the reasons why teaching is abolished, and then he can be a teacher. Therefore, the gentleman's teaching is to guide but not to force, to force but not to suppress, and to open but not to reach. If you follow the way but don't force it, you will be harmonious; if you are strong but don't suppress it, you will be easy; if you open but don't reach it, you will think; harmony and ease with thinking can be called good metaphor.
Luo You was an official in Jingzhou, and Huan Xuanwu was the king's cavalry and carriage assembly. The friend came in and sat for a long time, then left. Xuanwu said, "You wanted to consult me about something, why did you leave so quickly?" He replied, "My friend heard that mutton is delicious, but he has never had the chance to eat it in his life, so he came here without asking. There is nothing to consult you about. Now I am full, so there is no need for you to stay." He showed no shame at all.
The king creates music when his achievements are accomplished, and establishes rituals when his governance is established. Those who have great achievements have complete music, and those who have a good governance have complete rituals. The dance of Ganqi is not complete music, and those who are prosperous and worship are not complete rituals. The Five Emperors lived in different times, and did not follow each other's music; the Three Kings lived in different times, and did not follow each other's rituals. When music is excessive, it leads to worry, and when rituals are rough, they become biased. And when
Kong Pushe was the attendant of Emperor Xiaowu, and was invited to visit Emperor Liezong's tomb in advance. Kong was the Minister of Rites at the time. He was thin and frail, and wore heavy mourning clothes. He cried all day long, and those who saw him thought he was a truly filial son.
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