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A gentleman has three worries: if he has not heard it, he worries that he will not be able to hear it; if he has heard it, he worries that he will not be able to learn it; if he has learned it, he worries that he will not be able to practice it. A gentleman has five shames: if he is in his position but does not speak the right words, he is ashamed; if he has the right words but does not act the right words, he is ashamed; if he has gained it and then lost it, he is ashamed; if the land is surplus but the people are insufficient, he is ashamed; if the number of people is equal but double, he is ashamed.
When Taifu He was the governor of Wu County, he did not go out at first. The powerful families in Wu looked down on him, so they wrote on the gate of the government office: "The chicken of Kuaiji cannot crow." When He heard the news, he left home, looked back at the gate, asked for a pen and wrote: "It cannot crow, kill the Wu child!" Then he went to the various military camps and inspected the various Gu, Lu, and military officials, as well as the hiding and fugitives, and reported everything to the emperor, who punished many people. Lu Kang was the governor of Jiangling at the time, so he petitioned Sun Hao and was released.
The betrothal gift is seven intermediaries for the upper duke, five intermediaries for the marquis and earl, and three intermediaries for the viscount and the man, so as to distinguish the noble from the humble. When introducing and conveying orders, a gentleman dares not question the one he respects, which is the utmost respect. After three concessions, he can convey the order, enter the temple gate after three concessions, reach the steps after three bows, and ascend after three concessions, so as to show respect and humility.
Wang Anfeng鈥檚 wife, Changqing Anfeng. Anfeng said, "It is disrespectful for a woman to be sweet to her husband according to etiquette. Don't do it again." The woman said, "I love you, so I am sweet to you. If I don't be sweet to you, who will?" So the woman listened to him.
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