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The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
Ni Heng was demoted by Emperor Wu of Wei to be a drummer, and was tested on the drums at 15th day of the first lunar month. The Hengyang gong was the Yuyang gong, and its sound was like that of metal and stone, which made the expressions of those sitting around change. Kong Rong said: "Ni Heng's crime is the same as Xu Mi's. He cannot reveal the king's dream." Wei Wu was ashamed and pardoned him.
Also, the condolence ceremony of the princes is treated as if they were treated as princes. When the lady arrives, she enters from the gate and ascends from the side steps, while the prince is in the east. The rest is the same as the funeral ceremony. The sister-in-law does not caress the uncle, and the uncle does not caress the sister-in-law.
Therefore, if male education is not cultivated, yang affairs cannot be achieved, and it happens to be seen in the sky, the sun is eclipsed; if female obedience is not cultivated, yin affairs cannot be achieved, and it happens to be seen in the sky, the moon is eclipsed. Therefore, when the sun is eclipsed, the emperor wears plain clothes and cultivates the duties of the six officials, and eliminates the yang affairs of the world; when the moon is eclipsed, the queen wears plain clothes and cultivates the duties of the six palaces, and eliminates the yin affairs of the world. Therefore, the emperor and the queen are like the sun and the moon, the yin and the yang, and they need each other to succeed. The emperor cultivates male education, which is the father's way; the queen cultivates female obedience, which is the mother's way. Therefore, it is said that the relationship between the emperor and the empress is like that between a father and his mother. Therefore, to wear mourning clothes for the emperor is the same as to wear mourning clothes for the father; to wear mourning clothes for the empress is the same as to wear mourning clothes for the mother.
Wang Dongting and Xie Gong were at odds with each other. When the king heard about the funeral in the east, he went out of the capital to find Zi Jing and said, "I want to mourn for Gong." Zi Jing had just gone to bed, and when he heard his words, he got up in surprise and said, "I hope for Fa Hu." So the king went to mourn. The commander-in-chief Diao Yue refused to listen and said, "I have never seen such a guest in my life." Wang also did not speak to him, but went straight forward, crying bitterly, and left without holding the hand of the last maid.
Cao Gong asked Pei Qian, "You used to be in Jingzhou with Liu Bei. What do you think of Liu Bei's talents?" Qian said, "If he were to live in Central China, he could cause chaos but not bring order." If you can take advantage of the border and guard the dangerous places, you can become the master of one side. ”
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