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The one who is most benevolent has the most heavy mourning; therefore, for a father, he should wear mourning clothes for three years, which is a rule of benevolence. In the governance of the family, grace covers righteousness; in the governance of the family, righteousness cuts off grace. From serving the father to serving the king, and respecting the same, respecting the noble and respecting the elder, this is the greatest righteousness. Therefore, for a king, he should also wear mourning clothes for three years, which is a rule of righteousness.
"No! In the beginning of Lu, the royal family looked at the Fengbei, and the three families looked at the Huanying. In the same way, if someone's mother was skilled, then can't you do it? Is his mother skilled? Is she sick? Alas!" He didn't follow it.
Wang Wuzi is good at understanding the nature of horses. I once rode a horse, with chopsticks and money stuck in the mud. There is water in front of him, but he refuses to cross it all day. Wang Yun said, "This must be a barrier caused by mud." He asked someone to remove it and then crossed over.
Zhi Daolin first came from the east and lived in Dong'an Temple. Wang Changshi had a meticulous plan and had written a brilliant essay. When he talked with Zhi about it, he could not quite get along with him. Wang Xuzhi wrote several hundred words, claiming that they were full of famous theories and extraordinary writings. Zhi said slowly, "I have not seen you for many years, and you have made no progress in your righteousness." Wang was ashamed and left.
Confucian scholars live in a difficult place, sit up and stand respectfully, speak first and be honest, and act uprightly. They do not compete for the benefits of danger and ease on the road, and do not compete for the harmony of yin and yang in winter and summer. They love death and wait for it, and nourish their bodies and do things. They are like this in their preparation.
The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
When Shi Chong went to his toilet, there were always more than ten maids serving him, all of them dressed in beautiful clothes. There is everything available, including Jiajian powder, agarwood juice, etc. He also gave the guests new clothes and chopsticks and asked them to go out, and many of the guests were so embarrassed that they could not even go to the toilet. General Wang went there, took off his old clothes, put on new ones, and looked proud. The maids said to each other, "This guest will surely become a thief."
When Gu Rong was in Luoyang, he once accepted someone's invitation. He noticed that the person who was roasting meat wanted to be roasted too, so he stopped what he was doing. Those sitting together laughed at him. Rong said, "How can one hold it all day long and not know its taste?" Later, when he encountered chaos and had to cross the river, every time he was in danger, there was always one person by his side. When he asked him why, he found out that he was the one who was being burned.
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