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During the funeral of Confucius, two or three disciples all wore mourning clothes and went out. They wore mourning clothes when they were in a group, but not when they went out.
The same; the hemp of Qisui is the same as the hemp of Dagong; the hemp of Dagong is the same as the hemp of Xiaogong; the hemp of Xiaogong is the same as the hemp of Shi, if they are the same, then both should be worn. If the one who wears both is heavier, then the lighter one should be replaced.
When Ruan Ji's mother died, he enjoyed wine and meat in the presence of King Wen of Jin. Si Li He Zeng was also present and said, "Your Excellency is ruling the world with filial piety, but Ruan Ji is in a state of mourning and is seen drinking and eating meat in front of you. You should exile him overseas to correct the morals." King Wen said, "The successor to the throne is so disgraced, and you cannot share my sorrow. What's the point? Besides, drinking and eating meat when one is ill is a mourning custom!" Ji continued to drink and eat, looking calm.
The Master said: "The world and the country can be equal, the title and salary can be refused, and the sword can be stepped on, but the middle way is impossible."
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
He Yan and Deng Yang asked Guan Lu to make a hexagram, saying: "I wonder if the position will reach Three Dukes?" After the hexagram was made, Lu quoted the ancient meaning and took it as a deep warning. Yang said, "This is what old people always say." Yan said, "How amazing! The ancients thought it was difficult. Today, people think it is difficult to be sincere in communication. Now you have achieved two difficult things at the same time. You can be called 'the bright virtue is fragrant'. Doesn't the poem say, 'Hide it in your heart, how can you forget it?'"
People of Pei Pushe's time called it a forest of conversation.
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