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As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
Duke Huan wanted to move the capital, so Sun Changle expressed his advice on Zhang Tuo's career. He was convinced that this proposal was very reasonable.
Duke Ai asked Ru Bei to learn the funeral rites of scholars from Confucius, and the funeral rites of scholars were written there. Zigong watched the wax. Confucius asked, "Are you happy?" He replied, "All the people in the country are crazy, and I don't know how to be happy!" Confucius said, "A hundred days of wax and a day of radiance are not what you know. If you stretch without relaxing, civil and military officials cannot do it; if you relax without stretching, civil and military officials cannot do it. Tension and relaxation are the way of civil and military officials."
Wang, Liu and Lin Gong looked at He Huqi, but He Huqi just looked at the documents and ignored them. The king said to He, "I have come here with Lord Lin to see you. I hope you will put aside your daily routine and respond to profound words. Why do you have to lower your head to look at this?" He said, "If I don't look at this, how can you survive?" Everyone thought it was a good idea.
When serving a gentleman, the gentleman yawned and stretched himself, picked up his walking stick and shoes, and saw that the sun was setting. The attendant then asked to leave. When sitting in the presence of a gentleman, if the gentleman asks about the affairs of the day, the gentleman should stand up and answer. When one is sitting in the presence of a gentleman, if someone comes and says, "A moment," hoping to hear back, one should stand aside and wait. Do not listen sideways, do not respond loudly, do not look lustfully, and do not be lazy. When walking, do not be arrogant; when standing, do not limp; when sitting, do not spread your legs; when sleeping, do not lie prone. Keep your hair down and don't take off your hat. Don't expose your clothes when you are tired. Don't lift your skirt in the heat.
Mr. Zhu was transferred to the position of Taiwei's secretary and military officer by Zhang'anling. His name was well-known but his position was low, so not many people knew him. The Duke went out to the east, took a passenger ship, and sent several old officials to stay at Qiantang Pavilion. At that time, Chen Chong of Wuxing was the county magistrate. He was supposed to see off a guest to Zhejiang. After the guest left, the clerk at the pavilion drove the official to move to the cowshed. When the tide came, Chen Ling stood up and hesitated, and asked, "What's under the cowshed?" The official said, "Yesterday a poor man came to stay in the pavilion. We have distinguished guests, so we moved him away." The Ling was drunk and asked from a distance, "Would you like some cakes? What's your surname? Can we talk?" Chu raised his hand and answered, "Chu Jinye from Henan." People far and wide had known Chu's name for a long time, so the Ling was very anxious and did not dare to move him away, so he went to the Chu with a letter under the cowshed. He slaughtered more meat and prepared food, and presented it before the Duke, and then he whipped the clerk at the pavilion to apologize for his shame. The Duke drank and feasted with him, and his words and expressions remained the same, as if he was unaware of anything. Order to escort the Duke to the border.
Women's gifts include hazelnuts, dried fruits, dates, and chestnuts.
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