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The father offers sacrifices to the son and then orders the bride to go up, and the man goes before the woman. The son accepts the order and goes to the temple to greet the bride. The host sets up a banquet in the temple, and then greets the bride outside the door. The son-in-law enters with a goose, bows and yields to the gods, and then bows again to offer the goose, which is to receive it from his parents personally. . After the wedding, the bride comes out in the carriage, and the husband hands over the reins, and the bridegroom rides three times. He waits outside the door first, and when the bride arrives, the husband bows to her and lets her in, and they eat together, and drink wine together, so as to unite the body and treat the people equally, and treat them with affection.
After the grave is completed, they return home, and dare not enter the room. They live in a lean-to, mourning for their parents outside; they sleep on straw and pillows, mourning for their parents in the ground. Therefore, they cry without time, serve diligently for three years, and their longing for their parents is the will of filial sons and the reality of human nature.
There was a man named Zhou Feng in Lu. Duke Ai held a seal and asked to see him, but he said no. The Duke said, "I'll stop!" He sent someone to ask him, "The Yu clan did not show trust to the people, but the people trusted them; the Xia clan did not show respect to the people, but the people respected them. How did they get this from the people?" He replied, "In the ruins and tombs, they did not show grief to the people, but the people mourned; in the altars and ancestral temples, they did not show respect to the people, but the people respected them. The Yin people made an oath, but the people began to rebel; the Zhou people made a meeting, but the people began to doubt. If there is no courtesy, righteousness, loyalty, sincerity and honesty to govern them, even if they are firmly united, will the people not break away?"
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
Then the bald people do not strip, the hunchbacks do not bare, and the lame people do not jump, not because they are not sad; if the body is sick, it is not suitable for the ritual. Therefore, it is said: the funeral ceremony is mainly about mourning. Women cry and mourn, beat their chests and feel sad; men cry and mourn, bow their heads and touch the ground, which is the extreme of sorrow.
Duke Huan said in his bed, "If I stay like this, I will be laughed at by Wen and Jing!" Then he sat up and said, "Since I cannot leave a good reputation for future generations, I am not worthy of being infamous for eternity, am I?"
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