笑话 爆笑电影

The Yellow Springs Volume of Yi'an Fenghualu

When Zhi Daolin entered the east, he saw Prince Yi and his brothers returning. He asked, "How are you seeing the kings?"

Husband, please speak properly.

When Taifu He was the governor of Wu County, he did not go out at first. The powerful families in Wu looked down on him, so they wrote on the gate of the government office: "The chicken of Kuaiji cannot crow." When He heard the news, he left home, looked back at the gate, asked for a pen and wrote: "It cannot crow, kill the Wu child!" Then he went to the various military camps and inspected the various Gu, Lu, and military officials, as well as the hiding and fugitives, and reported everything to the emperor, who punished many people. Lu Kang was the governor of Jiangling at the time, so he petitioned Sun Hao and was released.

Best Wife

After Zhi Daoling passed away Faqian, his spirit became depressed and his character deteriorated. He often said to people: "In the past, Jiang Shi gave up his axe and asked the people of Ying for help, and Ya Sheng gave up his string instrument and asked Zhong Zi for help. They pushed themselves to seek outside, and it was not in vain! Now that the secret agreement is gone, no one will appreciate my words. With the knot in my heart, I will die!" One year later, Zhi died.

Huapin

Rebirth of the Urban Gardener

Xiaowu belongs to Wang Xun asking for a son-in-law, saying: "Wang Dun, Huan Wen, Lei Yu of the flow, neither can be recovered, and small as you wish, also good Yu family affairs, cool is not necessary. Just like the real long, Zi Jingbi, the best.

Little mommy runs with the ball

All food should be eaten in spring, soup in summer, sauce in autumn, drink in winter. In general, spring is more sour, summer is more bitter, autumn is more spicy, winter is more salty, and it should be smooth and sweet. Cattle are suitable for rice, sheep are suitable for millet, pigs are suitable for millet, dogs are suitable for sorghum, geese are suitable for wheat, and fish are suitable for foxtail millet. In spring, lamb and pig food is suitable for fat and fragrant, in summer, roe and roe food is suitable for fat and fragrant, in autumn, calf and deer food is suitable for fat and fragrant, and in winter, fresh feather food is suitable for fat and fragrant. Beef jerky, deer jerky, pig jerky, millet jerky, deer jerky, elk, deer, pig jerky, all have a xuan, pheasant and rabbit all have a li. Jue, sparrow, cicada, fan, sesame, water chestnut, durian, jujube, chestnut, hazel, persimmon, melon, peach, plum, plum, apricot, hawthorn, pear, ginger, cinnamon. The banquet of the senior officials has sashimi but no jerky, or jerky but no sashimi. The scholars do not have two kinds of soup and meat, and the common people and the elderly do not eat alone. Sashimi: in spring, use onions, in autumn, use mustard and pork; in spring, use leeks, in autumn, use polygonum. Use onions for fat, scallions for paste, three kinds of animals use fennel, and vinegar for mixing, and plum for beasts. Quail soup, chicken soup, quail, use polygonum. Stewed bream and bream, roasted young, pheasant, fennel, but no polygonum. Do not eat young turtles. Remove the intestines of wolves, remove the kidneys of dogs, remove the spine of raccoons, remove the buttocks of rabbits, remove the heads of foxes, remove the brains of pigs, remove the tails of fish, and remove the ugly parts of turtles. Meat is called "tuozhi", fish is called "zuozhi", dates are called "xinzhi", chestnuts are called "zhuanzhi", peaches are called "danzhi", and jujubes are called "zanzhi". When cows moo at night, they are dung, sheep have cold hair and are velvety and smelly, dogs have red thighs and are restless and smelly, birds have the color of deer and make sandy calls and are depressed, pigs look and cross their eyelashes and smell fishy, ​​horses have black backs and arms and leak, and young turtles are not eaten if their tails are not full enough to hold. Relax the green goose, the fat owl, relax the green duck, chicken liver, goose kidney, bustard's belly, deer stomach. Meat that is fishy and fine is called "sui", and the large one is called "xuan". Some people say that elk, deer and fish are "zu", deer are "piji", wild boars are "xuan", and rabbits are "wanpi". Cut onions like scallions and fill them with various acids to soften them. For soup, from the princes down to the common people, there is no order. The officials have no regular meals. When they are seventy, they have a pavilion, the pavilion of the emperor. Five on the left, five on the right, five in the room for dukes, marquises and earls, three in the pavilion, and one on the altar.