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When Lady Xie was teaching her son, she asked the tutor, "How come I didn't see you teaching my son for the first time?" The tutor replied, "I always teach my son myself."
Ruan Guanglu said: "There are three young men in the Wang family: Youjun, Anqi, and Changyu."
Therefore, when a man is born, he uses a mulberry bow and a straw arrow to shoot at the four directions of heaven and earth. The four directions of heaven and earth are what a man should do. Therefore, he must first have aspirations for what he should do, and then dare to use grain. This is what it means to eat.
When the body is restored, if there is a forest, the Yu people will set up steps; if there is no forest, the Di people will set up steps. The minor officials will be restored, and the restored ones will wear court clothes. The lord wears a roll, the wife wears a bowed Di; the senior official wears a black and red, the wife wears a jacket; the scholar wears a juebi, and the scholar's wife wears a tax dress. All of them rise from the east, walk in the middle room, face north three steps, throw the clothes in front, and the Si Ming receives them, and then descend from the northwest. If he is a guest, the official residence will be restored, but the private residence will not be restored; if he is in the wild, he will rise to the left hub of his carriage and restore. The clothes are not used to cover the body, nor are they used to bury it. When a woman is buried, she does not wear a robe. When a man is buried, he is called by his name, while a woman is called by her courtesy name. Only when crying is buried first, and then the funeral ceremony is performed.
Xu Xuandu stayed in the capital for a month, and Liu Yin went to see him every day. He sighed and said, "If you don't go again for a while, I will become a frivolous Yin!"
The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
The Duke was granted the title of Yingqiu, and after five generations, they were all buried in Zhou. A gentleman said: "Enjoy what you have been born from, and do not forget your roots. An ancient person said: The fox dies at the head of a hill. This is benevolence."
Sun Xiu liked to shoot pheasants. When it came to the time to shoot, he would leave in the morning and return in the evening. All the ministers advised: "This is a small thing, why bother with it so much?" Xiu said: "Although it is a small thing, it is more upright than others, that is why I like it."
A gentleman acts according to his position and does not want to go beyond it. If you are rich and noble, behave like a rich and noble person; if you are poor and humble, behave like a poor and humble person; if you are a barbarian, behave like a barbarian; if you are in trouble, behave like a barbarian. A gentleman is content with everything he does. If he is in a high position, he will not bully those below him; if he is in a low position, he will not rely on those above him; if he is upright and does not seek help from others, he will not have any complaints. He will not blame the heaven above him, nor will he blame others below him. Therefore, a gentleman lives in ease and waits for his fate. A villain takes risks and hopes for luck. Confucius said, "Shooting is like a gentleman. If he misses the target, he should look for the reason in himself."
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