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The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
Yu Daoji said: "In terms of thinking about the principles and harmony of ethics, I am ashamed of Kangbo; in terms of strong will and uprightness, I am ashamed of Wendu. From then on, I am a hundred times better than them all."
When Emperor Xiaowu of Jin was twelve years old, it was winter. He did not change his clothes during the day, but only wore five or six layers of single cotton clothes, and slept on a mat at night. Xie Gong advised, "Your Majesty's body should be kept in a regular state. Your Majesty is too cold during the day and too hot at night. I'm afraid this is not the right way to keep healthy." The emperor said, "Be active during the day and quiet at night." Xie Gong left and sighed, "You are no less rational than the previous emperor."
When Zhuge Daoming first crossed the Jiangzuo River, he named himself Daoming, which was second only to Wang and Yu. He was first the magistrate of Linyi, and the prime minister said to him, "Your Excellency should be the black-headed official."
Huan Shiqian was the eldest son of Sikong Huo. The nickname is Zhen E. When he was seventeen or eighteen years old, he had not been promoted yet, but the young servants already called him "Zhen'e Lang". He once lived in Xuanwuzhaitou. During the expedition to Fangtou, the chariots and cavalry overwhelmed the enemy, and no one on the left or right was able to rescue them. Xuanwu said to him, "Did you know that your uncle fell into the hands of the bandits?" Shi Qian was very excited when he heard this. He ordered Zhu Pi to be his deputy, and he rode his horse among tens of thousands of people. No one could resist him, and he rushed back directly, which impressed the three armies. Later, Heshuo used this name to cure malaria.
A gentleman is one who is well-informed, strong in knowledge, and humble, and who is kind and not lazy. A gentleman does not exhaust people's favors or exhaust people's loyalty, but maintains friendship.
Wang Gong was with his father in Kuaiji, and Wang Dazi also came to pay homage to his father's tomb. Gong went to the tomb to see them for a while. The two men were on good terms with each other, so he returned after more than ten days. The father asked Gong, "Why did you take so many days?" He replied, "I was talking to A Da, and he was so busy that he couldn't go home." The father then said to him, "I'm afraid A Da is not your friend." In the end, they became friends, and it turned out to be just as he said.
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