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Zixia asked the Master, "Live in the funeral of your mother and wife." "Live, talk, eat and drink."
Huan Xuan wanted to use the house of Grand Tutor Xie as his camp, but Xie Hun said, "The benevolence of Zhao Bo still benefits Gan Tang; the virtue of Wen Jing is not enough to protect a house of five acres." Xuan was ashamed and stopped.
When Emperor Cheng was in Shitou, Ren Rang killed the Palace Attendant Zhong Ya and the Right Guard General Liu Chao in front of the emperor. The emperor cried and said, "Give me back my ministers!" Rang disobeyed the order, so Chao and Ya were executed. After the matter was settled, Tao Gong had an old relationship with Rang and wanted to pardon him. Xu Liu'er's longing for her mother-in-law is the best, and you gentlemen want to help her. If he thought of his mother-in-law, he would have no choice but to give in to Tao Quan, so he wanted to pardon them both. When the matter was reported to the emperor, he said, "Rang was the one who killed my minister and he cannot be forgiven!" The officials believed that the young master should not be disobeyed, so they executed both men.
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
What is a "mao"? It is to cover the body. From the funeral to the small funeral, if you don't set up a "mao", you will be exposed. So you set up a "mao" after the funeral. Someone asked Zengzi, "Is it like wrapping up the rest after sending it away, or wrapping up the rest after eating? Do gentlemen wrap up the rest after eating?" Zengzi said, "My son, have you not seen the great feast? In a grand feast, after the feast, the three animals are rolled up and returned to the guesthouse. Parents are treated as guests, so they mourn! Have you not seen a grand feast? "If it is not a funeral, why ask and give?
When Xi Jiabin died, his wife's brothers wanted to bring their sister back, but she refused to come. He said: "Even if I cannot live in the same room with Xi Lang, I would rather not be buried in the same grave with him after death!"
There was a little boy in Zhongchao whose father was sick, so he begged for medicine. The host asked about his illness, and he said, "I have malaria." The host said, "You are a noble and virtuous gentleman, why do you have malaria?" He replied, "I came to be a gentleman, so I have malaria."
Yin Zhongjun said: "Kang Bo has not yet learned my wisdom."
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