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Bo Gao died in Wei and went to Confucius. Confucius said: "Why should I cry? For my brothers, I cry in the temple; for my father's friends, I cry outside the temple gate; for my teacher, I cry in the bedroom; for my friends, I cry outside the bedroom door; for my acquaintances, I cry in the wild. In the wild, it is already distant; in the bedroom, it is already important. Since You Ci came to see me, I cried to Ci's family." Then he ordered Zigong to be the host and said: "If you come to cry for you, bow to him; if you know that Bo Gao came, don't bow."
Wang Rong's daughter married Pei Wei and borrowed tens of thousands of dollars. When the woman returns, she does not mention her military looks. The woman immediately returned the money and he was relieved.
When Ruan Xuanzi had a good reputation, the Grand Commandant Wang Yifu saw him and asked, "Are the teachings of Laozi and Zhuangzi similar or different from those of the sages?" Ruan Xuanzi replied, "There may be no similarities." The Grand Commandant was pleased with his words and appointed him as an official. People in the world call him "three-language official". Wei Jie mocked him and said, “One word can refute it, why bother with three?” Xuan Zi said, “If he is respected by the world, I can refute him without saying a word, why bother with one word?” So they became friends.
Wang Xu often slandered Yin Jingzhou to Wang Guobao, and Yin was very worried about it and sought advice from Wang Dongting. He said, "You just need to visit Wang Xu several times, and when you go there, send everyone away and discuss other matters. In this way, the friendship between the two kings will be broken." Yin followed his advice. When Guo Bao saw Wang Xu, he asked, "What did you talk about with Zhongkan in private?" Xu said, "We always keep in touch with each other and have nothing else to discuss." Guo Bao believed that Xu was hiding something from him, and indeed their friendship became less and less, and the slander stopped.
Offering sacrifices and offering wine are respectful etiquette. Eating lungs is a ritual. Spitting wine is a ritual. At the end of the feast, it means that this is the main part of the feast, not just for eating and drinking, but for performing rituals. This is why rituals are valued and money is despised. After the cup is finished, it is placed on the west steps, which means that the feast is not just for eating and drinking. This is the meaning of putting rituals first and money second. If rituals are put first and money second, people will be respectful and yield without fighting.
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