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Zi said: "A gentleman refuses the noble but not the humble, refuses the rich but not the poor, then chaos will be eliminated." Therefore, a gentleman would rather let people float above food than let food float above others. Confucius said: "If you give way to wine, beans and meat and accept the bad, the people will offend the teeth; if you give way to the seat on the lapel and sit down, the people will offend the noble; if you give way to the position in the court and accept the humble, the people will offend the monarch. "The Book of Songs says: "The people are unscrupulous, resenting one another; accepting titles without yielding them, they have finally died." Confucius said: "A gentleman values others and despises himself, and puts others before himself, so the people will yield to him." Therefore, call someone else's ruler "Jun", and call yourself "Guojun". Confucius said: "In the interests of salary, those who die first and those who live later, then the people will not be disloyal; those who die first and those who survive later, then the people can be trusted." The Book of Songs says: "The thoughts of the former rulers were kept by the gullible." With this, the people still disloyalty died and cried without complaint.

Zeng Zi asked: "Do you mourn for three years?" Confucius said: "In the three-year mourning, you should be dressed, not stand in a group, and do not travel. Gentlemen use etiquette to embellish their feelings. If you mourn for three years, isn't it empty?" Zeng Zi asked: "The officials and scholars can get rid of their private mourning, but they have the monarch's mourning clothes. How can they get rid of it?" Confucius said: "If you have the monarch's mourning clothes on your body, you dare not wear them privately. How can you get rid of them? So it is not removed after the time has passed. In the case of the king's mourning, mourning is removed before offering sacrifices, which is a ritual. Zengzi asked, "Is it okay not to remove mourning for parents?" Confucius said, "The ancient kings established rituals, and did not perform them after the time has passed, which is a ritual; it is not that they cannot do it, but they are worried that it is too much. Therefore, a gentleman does not offer sacrifices after the time has passed, which is a ritual. Zengzi asked, "When the king dies, after the funeral, if the minister has parents in mourning, what should I do?" Confucius said, "Return home and live at home. If there are important things, go to the king's place and see him off morning and evening." He said, "After the king has been buried, if the minister has parents in mourning, what should I do?" Confucius said, "Go home and cry and come back to see the king off." He said, "If the king has not buried his parents, and the minister has parents in mourning, what should I do?" Confucius said, "Go home and cry and come back to see the king off. If there are important things, go back and see him off morning and evening. For officials, the old man in the house will perform the ritual; for scholars, the descendants will perform the ritual. The wife of a great official, if there is a serious matter, should also go to the king's place, morning and night. "

After Sun Xiu surrendered to the Jin Dynasty, Emperor Wu of Jin treated him with great favor and allowed him to marry his aunt's younger sister, Kuai, and their family was very stable. His wife was jealous and called Xiu a "raccoon". Xiu was very upset and refused to go in again. Kuai deeply regretted his mistake and asked the emperor for help. There was a general amnesty at that time, and all the officials were present. After he left, the emperor kept Xiu alone and said to him calmly, "The world is vast and open, can Madam Kuai follow its example?" Xiu took off his hat and declined, and then they became husband and wife as before.

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