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People say: "Gou Zi is outstanding, while Ah Xing is peaceful and harmonious."
When Liu Gongrong drank with others, he drank with a mix of dirty and inappropriate people, and some people ridiculed him. He replied, “Those who are better than you, must drink with you; those who are not as good as you, must also drink with you; and those who are of your level, must also drink with you.” So they drank together all day and got drunk.
Ji Kang was traveling in the mountains of Ji County and met the Taoist priest Sun Deng, and began to travel with him. When Kang was about to leave, Deng said, "Your Excellency is very talented, but you don't know how to protect yourself."
Pang Shiyuan of Nanjun heard that Sima Decao was in Yingchuan, so he traveled 2,000 miles to wait for him. When they arrived, they met Decao picking mulberry leaves. Shi Yuan said to him from inside the carriage, "I heard that a man should wear gold and purple when dealing with the world. How can he bend the flood and hold the silk women's affairs?" Decao said, "Get off the carriage for now. You know how to quickly go astray, and don't worry about losing your way. In the past, Bo Cheng worked in the fields with his wife, and did not envy the glory of the princes; Yuan Xian worked in the mulberry field, and was not interested in the official house. How can one sit in a luxurious house, ride a fat horse, and have dozens of maids, and then be extraordinary? This is why Xu and Fu were generous, and why Yi and Qi sighed for a long time. Even if one had stolen the title of Qin and had a wealth of thousands of horses, it would not be valuable enough!" Shi Yuan said, "I was born in a remote area, and I have rarely seen great principles. If you don't strike the loud bell or beat the thunder drum, you won't know their sound."
When granting titles, the Zhao is one and the Mu is one. The Zhao and the Zhao are of the same rank, and the Mu and the Mu are of the same rank. All officials are based on their rank. This is called the order of seniority. In sacrifices, there are people who give gifts to the brilliant and the humble, which is the way to benevolent to the lower. Only a virtuous ruler can do this, with enough wisdom to see it and enough benevolence to give it. "Bi" means "give", and it means to give the rest to those below. Hui is the lowest among the armor officials; Bao is the lowest among the meat officials; Zhai is the lowest among the music officials; and Yan is the lowest among the gatekeepers. In ancient times, criminals were not allowed to guard the gates. These four guards were the lowest among the officials. The corpse is also the most honorable; the most honorable is the last of the sacrifices, but the lowest is not forgotten, and the rest is given to it. Therefore, when a wise ruler is in power, the people in the country will not be cold and hungry. This is called the connection between the upper and the lower.
Establishing power and measurement, examining articles, changing the calendar, changing the color of clothes, distinguishing emblems, different tools, and different clothes, these are what he obtains and changes with the people. There are some things that cannot be changed: loving one's relatives, respecting the elders, and distinguishing between men and women. These are things that cannot be changed with the people.
The people of Jin said that Wen Zi knew people. Wen Zi was so withdrawn that he seemed to be unable to wear clothes, and his words were so quiet that they seemed to be out of his mouth. He recommended more than 70 families of officials in charge of the treasury of Jin. He did not make friends with them when he was alive, and did not ask them to be his sons when he died. Shu Zhongpi learned from Zi Liu. When Shu Zhongpi died, his wife was from Lu. She wore mourning clothes and mourning clothes. Shu Zhongyan reported it to him and asked him to wear mourning clothes and mourning clothes, saying, "I also did this when I lost my aunt and sister in the past. I did not prohibit it." He withdrew and asked his wife to wear mourning clothes and mourning clothes.
The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
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