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After Ren Kai lost his power, he no longer disciplined himself. Someone asked He Qiao, "Why did you sit by and watch Yuan Pei fail without helping?" He said, "Yuan Pei is like Beixia Gate, which is about to fall apart. It cannot be supported by a single piece of wood."
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
When Yu Chan first composed the Yangdu Fu, Dao Wen and Yu said: "Wen is a symbol of righteousness, and Yu is the hope of the people. When it resonates, it is as loud as gold, and when it is compared with virtue, it is as bright as jade." When Yu Gong heard that the fu was completed, he asked to see it and gave it as a gift. Chan changed "望" to "俊", and "亮" to "润".
During the three-year mourning period, one should not speak or answer questions. Lu means in the white room, one should not sit with others. In the white room, one should not enter unless it is the right time to see the mother. The elderly should live in the white room and not in the white room. Lu means strict. Wife should be treated as uncles and aunts, aunts and sisters as brothers, and the eldest, middle and youngest as adults. The mourning period for relatives is exempted, and the mourning period for brothers is exempted. The mother and wife of the king should be treated as brothers. Those who show their color should not eat or drink. Apart from the mourning period, when walking on the road, one should be surprised when seeing someone, and surprised when hearing someone’s name. When visiting the deceased or asking about his illness, one’s color and expression must be different from others. Only after this can one observe the three-year mourning period. The rest should be done in a straightforward manner.
To boil: Beat it, remove the wrinkles, weave the beef with reed cloth, sprinkle cinnamon and ginger on it, and salt it, and eat it dry. The same is true for sheep, and the same is true for elk, deer and roe deer. If you want to make the meat moist, then release it and fry it with minced meat. If you want to make the meat dry, then beat it and eat it.
Wang Wendu and Fan Rongqi were both wanted by Jianwen. Fan was older but held a lower position, while Wang was younger but held a higher position. They will move forward and push each other forward. After a long time of migration, the king stayed behind Fan. The king said, "When you winnow and sift, the chaff is in front." Fan said, "When you winnow and sift, the sand and gravel are behind."
In ancient times, when the princes shot, they had to perform the banquet ceremony first; when the ministers, officials, and scholars shot, they had to perform the village drinking ceremony first. Therefore, the banquet ceremony is to clarify the righteousness between the monarch and his subjects; the village drinking ceremony is to clarify the order of seniority.
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