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The betrothal gift is seven intermediaries for the upper duke, five intermediaries for the marquis and earl, and three intermediaries for the viscount and the man, so as to distinguish the noble from the humble. When introducing and conveying orders, a gentleman dares not question the one he respects, which is the utmost respect. After three concessions, he can convey the order, enter the temple gate after three concessions, reach the steps after three bows, and ascend after three concessions, so as to show respect and humility.
Dai Andao had already strengthened his rule in Dongshan, and his brother wanted to follow suit to stop him. Taifu Xie said, "Why are your ambitions so different?" Dai said, "I cannot bear the worry, but my brother is happy."
No one can escape the funeral procession unless they follow the coffin and cry. In all funerals, from minor to major, no bathing is allowed unless there are auspicious signs such as the mourning clothes and the funeral rites. In the case of a funeral of a young man, after the burial, if someone asks to see the deceased, then he can see the deceased; but if no one asks to see the deceased, then he can see the deceased. In the case of a minor funeral, then he can see the deceased if he asks to see the deceased. In the case of a major funeral, then he does not need to hold the coffin. Only in the case of a parent鈥檚 funeral, one does not need to weep and see the deceased. In the case of a three-year funeral, auspicious signs are followed; in the case of a full-term funeral, one cries and follows the deceased鈥檚 funeral; in the case of a nine-month funeral, after the burial, one follows the deceased鈥檚 funeral; in the case of a minor funeral, after the funeral, one follows the deceased鈥檚 funeral. Zeng Shen asked Zeng Zi, 鈥淚s there a fixed sound for crying parents?鈥 Zeng Zi replied, 鈥淎 baby lost its mother on the way, so what fixed sound is there?鈥 鈥
When Wang Xun was ill, he asked Wang Wugang, "Who do people compare my army to?" Wugang replied, "People compare me to Wang Beizhonglang." Dongting turned around and lay facing the wall, sighing, "People cannot live forever!"
When the father is in mourning, the sons in the palace cannot participate in the music. When the mother is in mourning, If the sound is heard, do not play music. If the wife is in mourning, do not play music beside her. When a great achievement is about to come, set aside the zither and the harp. When a small achievement comes, do not stop the music.
The lowly should not mourn the noble, the young should not mourn the old, this is the etiquette. Only the emperor should be mourned by calling the heaven. The princes mourning each other is not etiquette.
The Master said: "The great man does not get close to those who are virtuous, but trusts those who are humble; the people are lost because of this, and the teaching is troubled because of this. The Book of Songs says: "If they seek me, it is as if they cannot get me; if they hold my enemies, they will not be able to help me. 鈥橨un Chen said: 鈥業f you have not seen a sage, you are not able to see him; if you have seen a sage, you cannot follow him. 鈥欌
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