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When a girl is betrothed, she is given a tassel; unless there is a serious reason, she will not enter the bride's house. When aunts, sisters, and daughters return home after getting married, brothers should not sit at the same table with them, nor eat from the same utensils with them. Father and son sit at different tables.
Wang Shao and Wang Hui went to Xuanwu together, just when Yu Xi's family was being arrested. Hui felt uneasy and wanted to leave hesitantly; Shao sat still, waiting to receive the letter, and then left without making any progress. Commentators believe Shao is superior.
When Zhuge Liang camped at Weibin, Guanzhong was shaken. Emperor Ming of Wei was deeply afraid that King Xuan of Jin would go to war, so he sent Xin Pi as the military commander. King Xuan and Liang set up their camps across the Wei River. Liang devised all kinds of enticements and schemes. King Xuan was indeed very angry and was about to respond with a large army. Liang sent spies to investigate, and they reported: "There is an old man who resolutely holds a yellow axe and stands at the gate of the army. The army cannot leave." Liang said: "This must be Xin Zuozhi."
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
Yu Zhigong wrote to Huan Wen, saying, "Liu Daosheng is always busy with things, big or small, and is very happy. He is a man of integrity and good humor, and is a good friend. He is truly a good person, and I recommend him to you, so that we can share the hardship together."
Xie Huzi once went up to the roof to smoke rats. Since Hu'er had no way of knowing what his father had done, he heard people say, "Only a fool would do such a thing." Joking about it. The saying of the time is not the only one that can make this mistake. The Taifu realized his ignorance and, following his words, said to Hu'er, "People in the world are slandering Zhonglang for this, and also saying that I was involved in this." Hu'er was upset and stayed at home for a month without going out. The Taifu falsely cited his own mistakes to enlighten others, which can be regarded as moral teaching.
Duke Huan asked Huan Ziye: "Xie Anshi knew that Wan Shi would fail, why didn't he advise him?" Ziye replied: "So he should be difficult to offend!" Duke Huan said angrily: "Wan Shi is weak and ordinary, why is it difficult to offend Yan Yan?"
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