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A gentleman is usually reserved. A gentleman is ashamed to prepare funeral supplies. A gentleman will not do anything that can be prepared in one or two days. In mourning clothes, the sons of brothers are treated as sons, and they should be welcomed and brought forward; the sisters-in-law and uncles have no mourning clothes, and they should be pushed away; the sisters-in-law and sisters are thin, and some people accept me and treat them well. Eating beside a mourning person, I have never been full.
The Duke said, “Why don’t gentlemen today practice this?” Confucius said, “Gentlemen today are insatiable in their love of goods, untiring in their indulgence of virtue, idle and arrogant, and are sure to destroy the people. They use the people at noon to attack those who have the Way; they seek what they want, not what they should. In the past, people were used from the front, but now people are used from the back. Gentlemen today do not practice etiquette.”
Zixia lost his son and lost his sight. Zengzi expressed his condolences and said, "I have heard that when a friend loses his eyesight, he should cry for him." Zengzi cried, and Zixia also cried, saying, "Oh, God! I am innocent." Zengzi said angrily, "Shang, how can you be innocent? I served the Master with you between the Zhu and Si Rivers, and retired to live on the Xihe River until I was old. The people of the Xihe River suspected you of the Master, which was your first sin; you lost your parents, and the people did not know about it, which was your second sin; you lost your son and your eyesight, which was your third sin. And you said you were innocent!" Zixia threw his staff and bowed, saying, "I was wrong! I was wrong! I have been living alone for a long time."
When Pang Shiyuan arrived in Wu, the people of Wu all became friends with him. When he saw Lu Ji, Gu Shao and Quan Cong, he compared them and said, "What Lu Zi said about a slow horse is that it has the advantage of being fast. What Gu Zi said about a slow ox is that it can carry heavy loads and travel far." Someone asked, "If what you said is true, is Lu the better one?" He replied, "Although a slow horse is agile and swift, it can only catch up to one person. A slow ox can travel a hundred miles in a day, but how can it catch up to one person?" The people of Wu did not object. "Quan Zi likes to have a good reputation, just like Fan Zizhao of Runan."
Yin Zhongjun said: "Kang Bo has not yet learned my wisdom."
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